Once I learned that God was not the center of my life I knew I had to do something I did not want to do. I had to look in the mirror and check myself. I had to look at myself and look at what kind of person I had become.
In one of the darkest times in Israel's history the Prophet Jeremiah instructs the Israelites to do this same thing.
Lamentations 3:40 "Let us examine and probe our ways, and let us return to the Lord."
Examine - to search through.
Probe - to investigate or explore.
In this dark time, Jeremiah did not tell the Israelites to feel sorry for themselves or to get a group of people together and have a pity party, instead he tells them to search and explore their lives and to see what led them to become the wretched nation they were.
I must be honest and say as my life was mirroring the book of Lamentations I did not want to do any exploring of self. But I knew this is what I must do.
What I found out about "King" Dustin was I became just like the people that Jesus struggled with throughout His ministry.
"Woe to you, scribes and Pharisees, hypocrites! For you clean the outside of the cup and of the dish, but inside they are full of robbery and self-indulgence.
You blind Pharisee, first clean the inside of the cup and of the dish, so that the outside of it may become clean also." Matthew 23:25-26
The word hypocrite in the Greek means, "an actor or pretender."
Here are the Pharisees acting and pretending to be the righteous and Godly people. Kind of sounds like the author of this blog. Here I was in full-time ministry teaching Bible class, counseling, instructing people how to live life for God and the whole time I was doing this I was nothing more than and actor playing the lead role in my life pretending to be a Disciple of Jesus. When I looked in the mirror I saw a hypocrite.
My cup was sparkling clean on the outside but on the inside it was a a mess. The inside of my cup was filthy and dirty.
The second half of this verse Jesus tells the Scribes and Pharisees to clean the inside of their cup. The word clean carries the meaning and idea to purify oneself from wickedness.
My next blog entry I will discuss the first place I had to clean.
But until then I have two questions for you:
1) Have you divorced yourself from God?
2) Do you need to check yourself?
May the Lord bless you and keep you.
I wasn't quite sure how I felt about this blog at first but I have to say it is good. I'm glad to connect with you and see how you and Jackie are doing. Love you, brother.
ReplyDeleteLater when you look back on this time you will see it as a turning point—one that is destructive or it will turn out to be a real blessing. I'm praying for the blessing and have great hope. ~LL
Dustin, we love you and your family very much. It is good to see you taking the first steps to true repentance. We will keep all of you in our prayers. May the Lord bless you and keep you, Brother.
ReplyDeleteBarre & Angela
"Check yourself before you wreck yourself." - the Gospel according to Ice Cube.
ReplyDeleteSeriously though, don't we all need to check ourselves at some point? Those of us who would sit in judgement over someone else's repentance. Those who would look down on other's choices and plump up our own self righteousness. . . we all need to check ourselves.
Unfortunately, for most of the western church, clean outsides are more important than opening up ourselves to one another in repentance.
Maybe Ice Cube was on the right track after all.
wow...that's about it, brother.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad you are doing this.